24 Weeks and No Midwife

I haven't felt like a good example for BWB lately.  It's not that I am behaving recklessly or carelessly.  It's just that I have no professional caregiver right now, and I would never recommend that to any of my followers.  It's complicated.  Matt and I are keeping track of lots of things at home: blood pressure, blood sugar, oxygen, pulse, heart sounds, respiratory, fundal height, swelling (none at all), and urinalysis.  We can't hear Evangeline's heart rate on his stethoscope yet, and plan to get a fetoscope soon. Her movements get more frequent and stronger everyday, though. I need to do better on my diet and water intake as usual.  I eat so slowly and because there are so many other things pressing on me, I don't always eat as much as I should.  I'm working on it.  My weight gain is good.  I am 24 weeks along right now.

We've been in this position before.  When I was pregnant with Malakai, we were in a huge transition that was physically and emotionally stressful.  We ended up moving from CA to NY in my 3rd trimester, and decided on a midwife after we arrived.  Then, she couldn't help us with a home birth. So, I had to fight for the birth I wanted in the hospital.  It worked.  Malakai was the first water birth in that hospital, and it was nearly unattended (I say this as a good thing)!  It is good for me to reflect on that because it reminds me of how God has taken care of us in the past, and I can trust He will take care of us again this time.  That being said, I still firmly believe that his birth would've been handled better at home.  He had a meconium issue that you can see in the video below.  
At home, we would've suctioned and if he needed breaths, we have a warm tray (for a warm flat surface) ready right there so that he wouldn't have had to leave me at all and we wouldn't have had to cut his cord.  When a baby isn't breathing, he especially needs all the oxygen from his cord blood.  However, we were in the hospital.  So, they weren't set up to handle things like that.  I can't really complain as many many things were handled the way we wanted and they didn't give me much trouble at all.  We had zero separation, he slept with me and never in the crib thing, and when they were supposed to have him in the crib while we were being transported from delivery to recovery, they supported my decision to carry Malakai skin to skin inside my gown under blankets.  It's cold in the hospital!!  All things considered, we have a lot to be thankful for with our hospital birth experience.

A homebirth midwife such as a CPM (Certified Professional Midwife) is my preference of caregiver.  I personally believe that CPMs are better trained in the natural birthing process, and how to most effectively care for complications without the restraints of hospital protocols.  The care they provide prevents most complications in the first place.  On the other hand, they are skilled to know when things are not safe to stay home and when to transport to the nearest hospital.  They are passionate about what they do, and are not motivated by money or time (There are exceptions, of course.), but rather are motivated to provide customized care to mom and baby/babies.  Of course, I would never argue that CPMs are the only ones that provide this level of care.  I just feel like I have the best chance of getting the care I want, if I choose a midwife such as a CPM.

Because of the ridiculous legal situation with CPMs in our area, I can't share any of the details you may be wondering about.  I will say that I will continue to take care of myself, improve my diet and water intake, and we will plan Evangeline's bubble wrapped birth as soon as we can.  There are some options we are considering.  I hate that I can't just be open and share all the details with you.  Please just pray for wisdom in these decisions that need to be made very soon.  Please pray that the best midwife for this birth will be available and we will be able to relax and just enjoy the next few months before Evangeline's birth.

Thank you so much for your support.  I know that there are many BWB mamas who would make very different choices than I am right now.  I completely respect that, and I hope you can do the same for me in return. 

Home Birth, Midwives, and The Law

Silas in our herb bath still attached to his placenta (in a bowl next to him)

When you birth at home (assuming you have a great midwife), the focus is what is in the best interest of you and the baby, no strings attached.  At a hospital, even if you have excellent care, there are often hospital protocols and impatient medical personnel that you must choose to appease or fight.  I've had a great hospital birth, but even so, my midwife had to deal with a bunch of junk in the hallway to fight for my desires instead of just focusing on me and the baby.  There were things that happened to Malakai that we did not want, but had to because the hospital said so:  eye goop, vitamin k, ridiculous hearing test, not going home when we wanted to, etc.  At the hospital, the baby belongs to the hospital.  At home, we can just be a family.  Having a homebirth is not about having a fun or amazing birth experience for the mom.  It is a choice we make because we believe that is where our baby can have the safest most gentle birth without being cumbered about with much hospital protocols.  Yes, complications can arise, but they don't happen as much at home.  Unnecessary interventions (often because of hospital protocols or impatient medical personnel) CAUSE complications that require more interventions.  The most common are inductions, and timing labor and delivery to the extent that they do.  There are so many more, but most women don't even know they are wrong because they've never been taught otherwise.

Malakai on the scale after his pretty amazing hospital birth.
It makes me sad that all his beautiful vernix is gone here.
He was covered with it when he was born!

Certified professional midwives in states such as Indiana, practice "underground".  They must if they are going to help women who are having homebirths.  They can be extensively trained and certified, but the state simply does not allow them to obtain a license.  This legal situation is wrong, and those who act against it do so because they believe they are doing what is right in spite of the law.  This is much like how many people would respond to an anti-gun law.  I can tell you without a doubt that there would be countless people who would refuse to bend to that law and would not allow the government to disarm them.  Another example would be if it became illegal to carry a Bible or meet as a church.  Christians would then have to make a choice to obey the law or continue to follow their beliefs in spite of it.

In the case of Carol Velasquez, the deputy prosecutor claims that the issue is with illegally administering prescription drugs.  Those are the charges against Carol.  If Carol was carrying the drugs she is accused of carrying, she is in good company.  It would be very hard to find a midwife who doesn't carry Pitocin (for example). These midwives are simply arming themselves for any possible complication that may arise and the natural remedies are found to be insufficient.  Homebirth midwives should have the legal safety to care for their clients the best they can, but that is not the case at this time.  So, they give their clients the very best care while putting themselves on the line.

What needs to happen is that people need to speak up on the issue of homebirth freedom.  Midwives need to have the freedom to provide optimal care without the threat of the nightmare Carol Velasquez is going through right now.

Honestly, my husband put it in much better words than I did:

"Here is the thing, it is not a simple black and white issue. Is it technically illegal for a midwife to administer drugs such as Pitocin? I would have to answer yes. However, in order for midwives to be able to give excellent care to their clients and avoid certain complications they NEED to be able to use these drugs. The real problem is that it SHOULD be legal for CPMs to be able to use these drugs. By not allowing them to use them we are forcing midwives to either choose to compromise their clients care by forcing them to wait until they get to the hospital to receive treatment which in some cases may be too late when it could have been resolved easily at home by the midwife or take the risk because they are more concerned about the welfare of the baby and mother over the governing legislative body. Most midwives will choose the latter. It really is no different than a missionary going into another country where Christianity is outlawed, and under the pretense of being an English teacher, using that as a way to get into the country to teach them about Jesus. As Christians, we know it is TECHNICALLY illegal for them to teach Jesus and carry/distribute Bibles, but yet we encourage them, support them, pray for them, and fight for them if they get caught, because we believe it is the right thing regardless of what a governing body has declared. The same principle is true in this situation. The problem lies in the legislation, and I think some serious changes need to made at that level so midwives are not forced to make the sacrifices they do for the good of their clients."

 ~Matt Reeves